On my way home from the gym I often wait outside this christian bookstore and find myself reading the bookmarks and little cards they have displayed in the windows. The rest of the place is blocked from view so this is all I have to go off of. Apparently God likes kittens and bassett hounds. They seem to be very popular.

Now, there's nothing inherently offensive about this stuff. "Give Your Worries to God" and "God hears even the smallest voices." None of the cards say Baby Jesus Cries When You Do It Before You're Married or God Hates Fags. They are only offensive in their sugary cuteness and the way they consistently insist that it's all in god's hands. If this were really true then maybe these bookmarks and cards would be all we needed. Just a little reminder that everything's going to be okay. But really, this Jesus-Take-the-Wheel bullshit is bullshit and by making a kitten deliver your message of blind, unquestioning acceptance is just an insult to kittens. Bassett Hounds, however, deserve whatever they get.